Where the Avatars Are

James Cameron is better than all of us

Come on, man. This is supposed to be a sneak peak? I want to see some damn aliens. Don't you realize the world loves you because you gave us Aliens? I forgave you for Titanic and let you waste your talent toying around with squids and shit for a decade, but if you try toying around with my emotions one more time I swear I'm going to see your movie only once when it comes out. Or twice, but that's it.
nytimes

Sold!

Officially my first sold painting. I think they like it.

Spilt milk

What do you get when you cross spilt milk and spilt blood? That scene from Three Kings where the dude shoots up the speeding truck and all the milk goes everywhere and everyone is like “pssshhwaaa, oh no, what a waste”. It is the desert after all, and water plus calcium is more valuable than all Saddam’s gold bullion even if they are in Gucci bags.

Seriously though, there was a shooting right next door to the 3 of Clubs where my roommate goes a lot. I went there once on a Wednesday which is supposed to be indie night or something (indie chicks!) but the music was totally undanceable. After all, there is no point in getting loose if you can’t do some bumpin’, yo. Am I right?

So I went on a Saturday night which I hear is the night for that. There I was getting my groove on and a little while later this chick took my hand and led me off the dance floor! Then all of a sudden some tough guy popped out of the shadows and said, "want to take this outside?" Being sloshed and all, I naturally said, "I have no idea what your talking about!" That’s when he whacked my glasses off. Not cool, dude. So I calculated: I can either end up getting stabbed or something, or grab my glasses before they get stomped. I’ve already lost my glasses twice (that aint cheap) – once while sailing and once while crowd surfing at a Metallica concert (lost my shoes too... stupid, stupid, stupid). Anyway, I did the right thing and got my eyes back. When I returned the dude had disappeared as quickly as he had popped up. I was pissed.

And now this:

"One man died and another was wounded Sunday in what investigators think was a gang-related shooting at a Hollywood gas station. Three men in their 20s sat in a car at the Mobil station at Santa Monica Boulevard and Vine Street when an alleged gang member walked up and shot several times into the vehicle, hitting two of the occupants, police said. After the gunman fled on foot, the man in the car who was not wounded drove the other two to a hospital for treatment, police said. One of the two men later died of his wounds, police said. His name was not released pending notification of family members. Police said the other victim was shot in the arm and was expected to recover."

I’m sticking to Fridays. 80’s night is to gangstas as garlic is to vampires. Besides, 80’s night is to white boys as milk is to cats. And speaking of milk:

"A freeway offramp was closed for several hours Sunday after a tanker truck spilled thousands of gallons of milk onto the roadway. The truck overturned about 6:20 a.m. on the 60 Freeway near Industry. No injuries were reported. As much as 6,000 gallons of milk may have spilled across the road and down a storm drain, police said. Caltrans crews closed an offramp to clean up the mess. The offramp was later reopened sometime before 2 p.m. The crash occurred in a construction zone, where lanes are restricted as the freeway is being widened for a carpool lane."

Somewhere I was planning on pointing out how funny it is that the milk story is more interesting than the shooting. LA is ridiculous.

Aliens

Can't get it out of my head:
Ripley: "Get away from her, you bitch!"
Queen Alien: "Hiiiiiissssss!"
Genius.

UFC 92

I forgot to mention the last UFC fight. Plenty of knockouts, but I'd go for a flying scissor heel hook any day.

Totally done

Well, I spent the entire weekend trying to bust out a bunch of these goddamn paintings for Christmas presents (and perhaps some kaaaching action), and I must have gone through over a dozen yards of canvas and gold spray paint in failed attempts because I could never get the background colors just right. I seriously stayed up till 6 in the morning trying to get this shit done. I thought you were only supposed to stay up that late if you were like, making a movie or something. And what did I get for my over ambitiousness? Very little sleep, an achy back, a maxed out Happy Hydra Christmas American Express Rewards Card (dollars are called points), and a lesson learned: patience and planning. Namely: swatches, swatches, swatches. I learned the hard way that colors do indeed look different in varying lighting conditions. And of course there's always the wet/dry factor, the nature of the surface you're painting on, the viscosity of the paint, blah, black, blah. Man, I thought that once I finally got those dang stencils done (I don't even want to get into that) all I would have to do is lay them down and do a little pssssh spray business, and presto! Tsk, tsk. In the end I got so fed up that I tossed all my stencils. No more wataaah for you, Bruce. So in the end all I got was this meh orange one. And this red one which flipping sweet. See those golden rays? I painted them onto the canvas before stretching (yes, I stretch my own canvases, thank you very much). Those rays, they wrap around the frame. Does that totally blow your mind or what? Too bad I already promised that one to a friend. I honestly would never go through this much trouble just for myself. Sigh. Now I'm going to sit in front of the TV and veg out for a cou zzzzz...

Large yellow one is done

What do you think? I think I'll do gold rays with the next.